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How To Mess With Your Human’s Mind

by | Human Training

Mess with human's mind

Sometimes just for the fun of it, you want to mess with their mind.

Other times it’s because free human servants need a wake-up call. Especially when they try to gain control over you.

Whatever the reasons, it keeps them on their toes and reminds them who the boss is.

You.

Here are tips for you to try out with your free human servants. Just remember, don’t do it regularly. This is because they may think a visit to the vet in the portable gaol is needed.

You don’t want that to happen. As it means that thing called a thermometer will be shoved up your backside.

From my experience, two or three times a year is fun enough to mess with their minds.

Talkative and silent treatment.

This is easy and is sure to work.

One moment you are meowing at them. Responding to them when they are talking to you.

And the next moment you are silent.

Alternate between the two for a few days. You will love to see the confused expression on their faces.

Purr and hiss.

Humans love it when you purr. Especially when they stoke, cuddle, and kiss you. They think you like them, which makes them feel special.

To mess with them, when they have upset you, go-between purring with hissing over five minutes. If they are cuddling you, purr and then hiss. Be extra scary with your eyes wide open, showing your teeth.

Your humans will not know what to do and try to do anything to please you. Like, give you more food.

Use cat litter and then don’t.

You have trained your free loyal human servants to clean your cat litter tray daily.

This is great.

But if they are pissing you off and not cleaning it daily, this will drive them crazy.

Pee and poop as usual and then three days later do it in where it will catch them unaware. For example, poop in their shower. So in the morning, they find a big fat turd just when they are about to step into the shower.

It gets nice and soft. Just right to get on your human’s feet,

You get to hear them scream. Yeah, your job is done. The next day go back to using your cat litter as usual.

Eat and not eat.

Caution.

This technique should only be used by mature cats. Kittens do not try this; otherwise, it is off to the vet. Not a good thing to happen, I can tell you.

This is hard, I know. The main thing to remember its only short term. And you can always take some food and hide it to eat later.

It is best to do this when they are feeding you on their schedule, not yours. Naturally, you want to be fed when you want it. It is the law of being a cat.  It usually only takes a couple of days for your humans to realise how dumb they have been.

These are only a few tips, my feline friends. And I hope they will help you better control your free human servants.

Over to you, how do you mess with your human servant’s head?

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