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How To Toilet Train Your Human Servants

by | Human Training

cats toilet train humans

Don’t you hate it when your cat litter box is full of shit?

It is only natural to want a clean cat litter tray. After all, humans have a white thing called a toilet. Their pee and shit get flushed every time they use it. Unless they are dirty.

Unfortunately, not all humans are that clean with your tray. Which is a crime and can’t be tolerated.

Like many things in your life, you need to train (manipulate) your humans to do as you command. This should be done at a young age. However, it is never too late if they forget their training.

Your tray must be cleaned every day, and although these steps are drastic for some of you, they must be done. Once your humans see the error of their ways, they will return to the role of a loyal human servant in your domain.

Pee and shit everywhere

That is it.

Although you like your privacy and cover-up after going to the toilet, you must resist using your dirty cat litter tray during the training.

Peeing and shitting everywhere can be done in steps to see how quickly your humans can be trained.


1. Go to the toilet just outside your litter tray for 2 days.  It is so obvious.

Hopefully, your human will get the hint that your tray needs regular cleaning.

2.  If your litter box is not being cleaned daily after step 1, go to the toilet in the bath or shower. To be effective, make sure you shit in these places, so they notice.

If they still do not take action, go to step 3.

3. Pee and shit next to their bed. If you have seen your humans going to the bathroom at night, then if you can make sure they have an unpleasant surprise waiting for them. In fact, if you can eat something to give you a little diarrhoea, all the better.

4.  Okay, if you have tried all these steps and your humans are not cleaning your tray daily, it is time for the last action. This step is rarely used. But I know some humans are stupid.

You have a choice here.

Either open their linen closet and pee and shit over the towels and bed linen. Then close it, so they do not know. Do this for 3 days, and you can be sure they will notice the smell. If you can’t open the closet, then opt for their pillows, under the doona and sheets on their bed. It will not be long before they get the whiff of smelly pee, especially if you do it in summer.

By this time, even the dumbest human servant will realise the mistake they have been making. And you should start enjoying the right to having a clean litter tray every day.

Your toilet training is done!

How do you toilet train your free human servants?


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